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Top 10: Proven Signs She’s Interested
No.10 Touching or flicking hair
For more than 40 years, researchers have been cataloging the non-verbal behaviours women use to let men know they’re interested (and vice versa). One important category of flirting is referred to as kinetic gestures, and it includes the oldest trick in the book: hair tossing. But while a casual, seductive toss or brief stroke of the hair can be her way of letting you know that she enjoys your company, continually toying with her tresses may suggest she’s nervous or uncertain about you.
No.9 Lip licking
Another kinetic gesture that women often unconsciously engage in in order to show their interest is licking their lips. This behaviour serves to draw your attention to her lips and indicate that a kiss could be in the cards. You should exercise caution in interpreting this behaviour, however, to avoid committing an embarrassing social gaffe. Occasional licking may mean she’s into you, but frequent licking may simply indicate a bad habit. So before you swoop in for a smooch, take stock of whether the rest of her behaviour matches up with her lips.
When you were a kid, your number one way of showing a girl that you were smitten with her was likely by stuffing some sand in her mouth. Consider teasing to be the adult version of this behaviour. Both men and women use teasing as a way to let another person know they’re crushing on them. For women, teasing has also been a way of testing your intentions. So don’t be too sensitive here — she might just be trying to assess your true level of interest.
No.7 She gets close
Merely being physically close to another person appears to increase how much we like them. Moreover, in opposite sex pairings, physical proximity appears to augment attraction between two people. When a woman deliberately moves closer towards you, she may therefore be luring you into liking her more. Let her make this move first before you reciprocate, however, as a sudden invasion of personal space may be worrisome to her if you read her signals wrong.
No.6 She shares back
Once you’ve got the ball rolling in the conversation department, try taking things to the next level by sharing something about yourself with her. The less you know her, the more positive and less personal the information should be, or you risk scaring her off. A reciprocal response where she offers up a similar level of information about herself is a hint that she has a favourable view of you, since both women and men tend to disclose personal details to people they like. Also, though you might think it’s superficial to bond over a mutual love of salt and vinegar chips, sharing serves to increase the feeling of intimacy between two people, meaning she’ll like you even more.
No.5 Friendly response to your chat-up
Forget all the pickup lines you’ve ever rehearsed. When it comes to gauging her interest in you, the wittiness of your remarks appears to be much less important than how she responds. A monosyllabic answer, particularly when delivered in a clipped tone, is her way of shutting you down. A smiling, friendly response, however, is a green light to follow up with further conversation. To minimise the amount of time at your next social event that you spend speaking to women who simply aren’t interested, open with questions that can be responded to simply. That way, if she’s not interested, she can exit the conversation quickly. And if she is, you’ll know right away.
No.4 Open postures
Both men and women send important signals to others simply by changing the orientation and postures of their bodies. A woman who has her body turned away from yours, particularly if it’s at a 90-degree angle, is non-verbally blocking your attempts at getting to know her. Crossing her arms and leaning away from you are two other stances that indicate that a conversation will be a non-starter. Poses that suggest she’s receptive to further communication with you are much more open. For example, she’ll turn her body to face yours, her arms will be uncrossed and she’ll lean in toward you.
No.3 Mirroring gestures
There’s a reason they say imitation is the most sincere form of flattery. It turns out that when a woman digs you, or wants to sell you a new suit, she’ll copy your moves. For example, she’ll touch her face, reach for her glass or adjust her body a few seconds after you do. It’s not just women, however, who can use this information to their advantage. When you mirror her gestures, she’ll feel more at ease around you. She’ll also get the impression that you two are alike, which will increase her opinion of you, given that humans tend to have warmer feelings toward people they believe to be like themselves. Just remember to avoid being obvious — overt mimicking will leave her with the impression that you’re making fun of her.
No.2 Head tilt and smile
Another flirty gesture that’s been amply described and investigated by scientists interested in non-verbal behaviour is what is referred to as head canting. Essentially, head canting is simply a fancy name for when a person tilts their head to one side. In women, when this tilt is accompanied by exposing the neck and a small smile, it sometimes means that you’ve caught her attention. Paired with eye play, this combination can be devastatingly attractive to men.
No.1 Eye play
Eye contact is a powerful mode of communication among humans, and repeated or prolonged eye contact usually serves two main purposes: to convey interest or hostility. When it comes to the former, ethologist Irenaus Eibl-Eibesfeldt was the first to describe how women the world over let their eyes do the talking. To figure out whether she wants to talk to you, watch out for a glance that catches your eye, breaks eye contact and then catches your eye again shortly afterward. If you notice that she looks at you once but doesn’t look back, she’s not interested. Also, don’t worry that you have to catch this signal the first time it’s made. Research has determined that women will continue to send it to you when you’ve piqued their curiosity, possibly because it takes men a while to process receiving it, as well as harness the courage to strike up a conversation.
Know what you do and do what you know.